Life’s crossroads are supposed to create opportunity for us to choose between different options, choices that must be made — not just when things are not working out as we had planned, but also during positive moments when we must choose to continue the course or veer off into something new such as when we experience an ending in a marriage, a change in careers, political upheavals, the end of child-rearing, or challenges with our health.
The crossroads are not limited to the years we have spent on this earth, and in my experience they don’t get any easier.
What we find ourselves facing can either inspire us to choose differently, or during these moments of change we can paralyse ourselves with fear. Oh, for a divine message, a bolt of lightning, or a lotto ticket win.
I read that making a crossroads a moment of profound and lasting change and learning how to thrive when life’s changes descend upon us can be learned.
Let’s see how……
1. Do not settle for normal. When our habitual response leads us to what is expected and customary — when we choose ordinary — we can expect the unremarkable. Well, unremarkable is not what we are!
2. Do not resist. Attempting to control, manipulate or force things to happen is a typical response to the fear that comes with change. Some of us will be so fearful that we refuse to make a change without understanding that even if we choose not to make a decision or take action, this in and of itself is a choice.
3. Trust your deepest feelings for guidance. We all know, deep within ourselves, what we need to do — what we know, how to think, when to trust — during times of crisis. We can learn to access and trust our innate wisdom; it is personal and always available. Through this, we will know how to adjust our course, move toward our personal destiny. When we don’t follow our inner guidance, we feel a loss of power and energy. Whiteboard the pro's and con's?
4. Dream bigger. Change what you expect from life and then create a plan and work to cultivate the right conditions for your growth and success. It’s never too late, you are never too old to dream bigger!
5. Limit distractions and strive to create balance in the midst of chaos. When we let go of our own or other’s agendas and when we push away the demanding concerns of the moment, we are able to hear our own thoughts. Be true to yourself!
6. Failure is just another way to start again. When we face a crossroads with fearlessness and the choice turns out to be prosperous, we are hailed as a genius or visionary. When our choice creates failure, then we are judged harshly, ridiculed and diminished, and it has the potential to make being fearless more difficult when we face the next crossroads.
We must remember that failing creates not only additional opportunities for success, but fosters courage and determination in those of us who are brave enough to attempt it.
For many years I have been inspired by the words of Katherine Mansfield.
Risk! Risk anything! Care no more for the opinions of others, for those voices. Do the hardest thing on earth for you. Act for yourself. Face the truth.